Sometimes, in order to fully embrace our authentic self and our life’s purpose, we need to first forgive and let go.

We may need to forgive ourselves for all the harsh words and abuse that we have given ourselves during our life. We can truly be our own worst enemies! Putting ourselves down, calling ourselves names, punishing ourselves harder than we would ever consider punishing others. Can we fully forgive ourselves for this? When we do, we can fully meet ourselves in the here and now, and move forward as a whole person.

We may need to forgive others for the pain and abuse that they have caused us over the years. Some may have seemed intentional, some may have seemed unintentional, but we often hold both in our hearts and in our souls, where they fester and grow and turn into bitterness. Many think that by holding on to those hurts, we are somehow holding the culprits accountable. But we are not. And they are not the ones suffering. We are. Forgiveness is not about condoning their behaviour or saying that you are open to that sort of behaviour again. It is about releasing the pain and the ‘hold’ that it has on you. It has absolutely nothing to do with the other person, but everything to do with you. You can forgive, and still remember. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that it’s no longer part of your story. It simply heals your pain around it, so that you can fully embrace your authentic, loving self.

We may need to let go of who we thought we were. Perhaps we have been trying to be a certain person, pushing through barriers and uneasiness in order to “prove” that we are such and such. But being your authentic self doesn’t require pushing or proving anything. It simply means being. It means fully being who you are, who you are meant to be. It doesn’t mean that you can’t improve or change, but first, it means fully being who you are, instead of trying to be someone that you are not.

“Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else.” – as Judy Garland said.

We may need to let go of who others thought we were. It’s quite hard not to be influenced by the society and community that you grow up in, and everybody will have ideas and opinions about who you are and who you should be. It can be things like the cliché of ‘boys don’t cry’ and ‘girls have to be sweet and kind’ or it can be things like “You always did well in school so you should study to become a doctor – just like your dad!” or other assumptions. I have written before about the word ‘should‘ before but it keeps coming up. We have sooo many should’s in our lives and many of them are not ours. They are what our parents, teachers, friends, society thinks we should be and do. But being and doing that, is not embracing our authentic self. So we may need to look through those should’s and let go of the ones that aren’t ours.

We may also need to let go of things in order to feel ‘good enough’ to be our authentic self. This is linked with the forgiveness, but it may also be identifying limiting/negative beliefs that are holding us back from truly embracing our authentic self. We might not fully believe that it is safe to do so, or that it is ok for us to do so. Letting go of those beliefs, fears and worries are important too.

And we may need to let go of physical things in our lives to clear out our space and lives energetically. Physical things hold energy, and without us being aware of it, they can clutter our minds, our thoughts and our lives. Regularly decluttering your physical space (and being aware of what you bring into your space) can be an important part of forgiving, letting go and embracing your authentic self too.

Once we have forgiven and let go, we can fully start to see and feel our true authentic self. And we can fully embrace her (or him).

I believe that we all, at our core, are beautiful, compassionate, loving, creative, honest, true and simply amazing. But sometimes, we need to do a bit of forgiving, letting go and decluttering in order to fully see and feel that. It’s not a once-off thing. It’s an ongoing process. There will always be more layers to go through, but once you start to get a glimpse of all that you can be, all that you are, you will want more of that glorious, shining light ✨


If you want to start embracing your authentic self more fully, get in touch! I would love to support you on your journey. You can book a free discovery call here.

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